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Tears on Both Sides of the Ocean (part 7)

By: Jeff Gustafson

Upon arriving in Wakayama, Eke made a bee-line to her bedroom and set her luggage in the corner and without even turning on a light, landed face down on the mattress and was immediately fast asleep. She didn't wake up till well past noon the next day, which was to her good fortune since dad was at work and so she had time to talk to mom before he returned to get a sense for what she was about to face.

It wasn't just her dad that was the problem. Mom was cooking up a storm in the kitchen as Eke made her appearance. She soon found out, the entire adult Suki family including her grandfather, was coming for dinner at six to talk to Eke.

"Are you hungry?" "How did you sleep", mother Suki said to her daughter. Eke nodded affirmative as she sat down at the table with elbows up and hands on each side of her head while she took one last moment to gather herself before asking mom "what was going on." Mother Suki could see the anguish in her daughters face and walked over and extended her arms as Eke started once again to cry saying "mom, why did dad have to do this? I only had 3 weeks left till graduation." "Your father loves you, honey, and he only wants the best for you. Just listen to him and give him time and things will all work out," she concluded.

Eke and mom talked for the rest of the afternoon and she shared her feelings about Carlo and her American parents and her wonderful experience in America. And this seemed to calm her as her mom just listened. Mother Suki could tell immediately that her daughter had grown a lot since being in America and that she was fearful that Eke was not going to lie down and just accept things as they were desired by the family elders. This scared her for Eke was all she had - her only daughter; her best friend; her life over the past 19 years. But she listened with sad eyes and love in her heart.

That evening, everyone started to arrive and Eke greeted them with respect and love for her family had always been there for her as a child and family was an important part of who she was. Grandpa Suki upon arrival took Eke by the hand and walked her alone to the back porch where he reminded her of the importance of family and the responsibilities of Japanese children to honor and obey their elders and to remember the importance of saving face. (It is inbred from an early age in the Japanese culture that family is a source of stability and strength and that in order to reach a child's full potential, they need the support of their family.)

Eke understood all of this and she listened respectfully. But she also knew what was in her heart and at the right moment, she was going to tell her father how she felt about Carlo and hope that because of his love for her open his.

The evening from that point forward consisted of Eke listening to the adults talk to her about what was expected as a Japanese daughter and the advantages of miai-gekkon and how "it has worked for centuries in Japan" and how the western cultures suffer from such a high rate of divorce. The case was made clear and again Eke listened with her head but silently thought from her heart as she wished Carlo was at her side.

The evening seemed to last forever which is often the case when we wish we weren't there. But Eke got through it. The one thing that did concern her, though, and it was made very clear; the family had circled the wagons and convincing them of anything was not going to be easy.

Carlo finished his breakfast and although it wouldn't have been his first choice, the food was filling and he was so hungry that most anything would have tasted good. He walked back to the hotel thinking that he needed to get a plan to get in contact with Eke and/or her family. If he had to, he could just take a chance and catch a taxi and go straight to the house. But then again, although that was his preference, he knew that might be considered disrespectful. So he was going to have to find a different way for now since he had some time - He was prepared financially to stay in Japan for up to 3 weeks. (...to be continued)

Article Source: http://article-kingdom.co.uk

Jeff Gustafson and MyHATT, An international dinner club concept where people get to know people one bite at a time...thank you to The Daily Buzz and my entire MyHATT contributing staff for the educational content for world culture, the history, world traditions, the international menus for this dinner party/social activity... www.myhatt.com

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